Why I Draw what I Draw...

I usually tend to draw to get some emotion out, or to get something I can't tell, off my shoulders. Sometimes if I want to give a particular person a message, I'll draw a picture, usually from a song I relate to them or something they'll know is related to them.  There're a couple on my Facebook at the moment like that...I don't know if they've seen them and know they're telling them something, but I expect they've at least seen them.

Drawing tends to calm my mind.  I can show what I'm really feeling, or thinking.  Either generally, or when I'm listening to a particular song and I feel something or see something in my mind.  And other times I just need to draw something I like to occupy my mind with something else.  Having Depression and Anxiety is a burden, and it's influence can be seen in quite a few of my drawings.  Drawing just a photo of my idol, Amy Lee, allows my mind to focus on that rather than whatever nonsense it's making up itself.  My singing does that too - I can get all my emotion out when I sing and a lot of the time I'll feel better for a while after.

I don't draw all the time - usually when I do I'm really down or really happy.  Unfortunately, it's usually the latter, but it means that I can get out all the bad stuff through my pencil rather than other means that may not be too healthy.  I'll draw whatever I see in my mind and that particular point.  They're usually from songs I'm listening to, a song that has a particularly poignant meaning to me recently or a song I have stuck in my head.  I've had a lot of heartbreak and pain associated with that - and that's quite evident in all my drawings apart from the ones of Amy Lee.  Drawing is a good way of getting it out - as well as singing.  I find the drawing helps while I'm doing it.

The drawings from songs I do are usually memories - some are things I see in my mind, like the burning paper in my hands from 'Erase This' by Evanescence; the lyrics are, "Not enough to say goodbye!  Burn it till there's nothing left!" - and that's what I saw at the time when I heard those lyrics.  The lyrics, "It's all gone!  The only world I've ever known sleeps beneath the waves...but I remember!" from Never Go Back by Evanescence reminds me of going out to a place where there was a lighthouse with someone I used to be close to.

There are many reasons why I draw what I draw...But they all seem to revolve around the same thing - how I'm feeling, what I'm feeling and what is missing.